


22) Near, Far, Wherever You Are

by tbazzsnow (Artescapri)



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Carry On Round Robin, Cook Pritchard's scones, Date Night, Gratuitous Titanic References, M/M, Soft Boys, boating mishaps, small islands, stranded is the prompt, there may be some kissing, we're almost to the end of this story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-06 04:27:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21220556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Artescapri/pseuds/tbazzsnow
Summary: After the culmination of the events of the last chapter Baz and Simon yearn for a little time on their own. The room is good enough for Baz but Simon has other ideas for a proper date. Scones, picnics, a date night, boats, lists, and more. It's Simon and Baz--what could possibly go wrong?





	22) Near, Far, Wherever You Are

**Author's Note:**

> Round Robin Chapter 22
> 
> Prompt: Stranded

**Chapter 22**

**Simon**

Shitstorm is putting it mildly. The past few weeks have been bloody awful. 

We were lucky Ms. Possibelf got to us first. Baz told her what the Mage had done to him. 

I don’t think she believed him at first. Baz offered to let her cast a truth spell on him but she wouldn’t do it. 

She seemed more willing to listen after he offered though. 

We took her there. To the Catacombs. Where we left the Mage 

She stared at his body for a long time. Then she took her wand out and touched it to his forehead and whispered **_“the truth will set you free.” _**

Ms. Possibelf went very still then. I couldn’t hear anything much, just heard a faint buzzing noise. 

I think Baz could hear, with his vampire senses. His grip tightened on my hand and then he pulled me closer, so we were shoulder to shoulder, pressing against each other. 

I don’t know how long we stood there with her, in the flickering light of the torches she’d lit on our way in. Stood while she listened to whatever it was she was hearing from the Mage’s still form. 

I know she had tears in her eyes when she finally lifted her head. 

She’d stepped away from the Mage then, not even sparing him a glance. She’d gone straight for Baz, putting her hands on his shoulders and looking up at his face. “Are you alright, Basilton?” 

Baz had nodded. She’d lifted a hand to his face, patting his cheek gently. “He had no right, no right at all.” 

They had stared at each other for a moment, until Baz nodded his head. Ms. Possibelf had squeezed his shoulder and nodded back. “Off with you then. Go on up to your room. Get some rest before the members of the Coven get here.” 

She’d patted my cheek too, eyes full of sadness. “I’m so sorry, Simon. Believe me when I say I didn’t know.”

I’ve always liked Ms. Possibelf.

The Coven members did come. We sat in the Mage’s office with them, answering questions. Together. Separately. With truth spells. Hours of it. 

They had Ms. Possibelf up there too. 

There was an inquiry. Of course there was an inquiry. 

Baz’s aunt Fiona insisted on being the one to drive us there. 

She made Baz sit in the back of her car. “The front seat is for people who haven’t been kidnapped by power hungry arseholes.” 

“He was that arsehole’s right-hand man for years,” Baz had protested, pointing directly at me. “The Mage whisked him away from a care home. That’s equivalent to an eight years’ long kidnapping. Mine was only half a day.”

“Snow obviously had Stockholm Syndrome, you git. And I’ll not have him getting sick all over my car, Basil. Sod off and get in the back.” 

She and Mr. Grimm sat on either side of us at the inquiry, flanking us like bodyguards and glaring at anyone who even looked in our direction. It was awkward but oddly comforting. 

It took days to finally clear us. Days of questioning. Truth spells again. Ms. Possibelf’s testimony. 

I was worried that the spells would cause me to spill the truth about my relationship with Baz. 

I think he was too. 

I needn’t have been fussed about it. Seems the roommate bond is taken seriously by most mages and no one questioned me seeking Baz out when the Mage had taken him. 

It was hard sitting next to him day after day and not getting to touch him. 

Our fingers brushed sometimes. And he kept his leg pressed against mine, thigh to thigh. 

He would sit sideways in the back of Fiona’s MG, leaning against the window, feet propped up on the seat despite her complaints. 

When I would drop my hand in the space between my seat and the door Baz would slide his hand forward and touch my fingers. Fiona was none the wiser. 

We’ll have to tell them sometime, I suppose. We’ll have to tell everyone we’re together. 

I want to.

I want to reach out and take Baz’s hand whenever I feel like it (which is all the time). I want to slide my arm around his waist and pull him close. I want to kiss him _hello_at breakfast and kiss him _goodbye_before he goes to football practice. 

I want that. I want that a lot.

We haven’t talked about it much, with everything that went on. We haven’t talked about _us_. 

It was a relief when it was all over and we were finally left to our own devices. Free to go back to our room in the tower. Free to snog each other senseless in the privacy of our room. 

Free to push the beds together and sleep wrapped in each other’s arms. 

It’s bliss. 

I love it. 

But I want to do something special for Baz. Something to make up for all the stupid things I said (I’m never drinking champagne again, magicked or not). 

To apologize for making him feel that I didn’t trust him. For letting him down time and time again. 

I want to be his boyfriend. His terrible boyfriend. And I want to ask him properly, to make it official.

After all we’ve been through, with all the doubts and miscommunication we’ve had, I want to clear the air and tell him in no uncertain terms that I want this. 

I want us. 

It takes a bit of planning. Thank Merlin for Headmistress Bunce. She took over the school when the Coven arrived and she’s officially in charge now. Which means we have internet again and the electronics ban is lifted. 

Google gives me too many options for romantic dates. I have to narrow it down to options that are close enough to get to from Watford and _e_asily paid for with leprechaun gold. 

Which basically leaves me with a picnic in a park. And maybe a romantic boat ride. 

At dusk.

That’s well romantic, isn’t it?

I wheedle Cook Pritchard in to making me up a basket. I also get rid of the sprite that’s taken up residence in the pantry, which makes it easier to convince her.

I’ve got sandwiches and scones, biscuits and two bottles of Ribena. 

And I saw Cook slip in some brownies right before I took the basket away. She knows Baz has a sweet tooth. 

Convincing Baz to come with me is the hard part.

“Tell me where we’re going, Snow.” 

“You called me Simon before.”  
  
He rolls his eyes at me. “Tell me where we’re going, _Simon_.” 

We’re in our room, done with classes for the day. I’ve got the basket tucked under my desk. I don’t think he’s noticed it yet. 

I’d think he could smell the food. 

“It’s not much of a surprise if I tell you, now is it?” 

“I’m not up for surprises. We’ve had too many recently.” 

“This is a good surprise.” 

He looks dubious but I finally manage to convince him. There’s a fair amount of kissing involved. He’s flushed and bright eyed by the time we head down the stairs. I’ve got the basket in hand. 

I probably should have asked him to be my boyfriend right then, snogged him senseless until long past dinner and then shared the basket with him in our room. 

Baz can magic crumbs away. He’s done it with his crisps for years. 

Instead we take a cab to the train station and then make our way to the lake I found. 

Baz spends the entire train ride complaining.

“Are you sure you know where we’re going?”

I give up even trying to answer. I just take his hand and bring it to my lips. “You said you trust me.”

That makes him smile. He leans over to press a kiss to my temple. “I do.” It’s just a whisper but it sends a shiver through me as his breath brushes my ear. 

I want to be worthy of his trust. 

I seem to have made a good choice. The lake is a short walk from the station but at this time of day there are few other patrons there. It doesn’t take me long to find the paddle boats.

There’s no one at the kiosk but I don’t let that stop me. “Come on, Baz. What’s more romantic than a boat ride before sunset?” I try to raise my eyebrow but I think I just end up waggling it. I must look a fool but I don’t think Baz minds. He gives me that soft smile again. The one I love. 

The one that’s just for me. 

We wrestle a boat free and onto the water’s edge. I place the basket in the middle and then Baz and I climb in.

Then I climb back out and push the boat into the water while Baz laughs at me from his seat. “I can magic it out there, Snow, you don’t have to get all wet.” 

“I won’t.” I give the boat a push until it’s just bobbing on the water and then I take a running leap into it. 

Which upsets the basket and Baz and makes the boat rock so hard it nearly tips over. I think the only reason we didn’t tip is because Baz had his wand out and shouted a “**_steady on” _**before it all went to hell. 

My shoes are wet and so are the cuffs of my jeans. 

Baz just shakes his head at me. “Incorrigible, Snow. I thought you wanted a romantic boat ride not a reenactment of the sinking of the Titanic.” 

I bump his shoulder. “I’d have made room for you on the door. Unless you kept calling me ‘Snow.’ I’d have gladly let you meet your doom then.” 

“That’s simply cruel, Simon.” But he calls me ‘_Simon_’ this time. And he bumps his shoulder into mine in response and stays pressed against me. I take his hand, threading our fingers together.

We paddle around on the water for a bit but I picked this lake for a specific reason. It's big but there’s a small island in the middle, a bird sanctuary according to the website, but you can visit and picnic there. It’s isolated and private and just what I want for us.

We make our way there and I realize there’s not a good way to bring the boat up onto the shore, which means I’ll have to wade into the water and pull it up myself. That’s fine. Baz can magic me dry. 

I didn’t realize he was going to try to do it himself so we both end up climbing out of the boat at the same time. 

Which makes the boat rock from side to side again. I lose my grip on it and end up sitting in the shallow water. Baz grabs the food basket with one hand and waves his wand at the boat with the other.

He casts a **_“ship to shore” _**but nothing happens.

I go to push the boat from behind while he tries a **_“run aground.” _**That doesn’t work either and I can see Baz shake his hand out then bend forward to peer at his wand. I give another big push and end up slipping on the slimy stones and land face first in the water.

The boat drifts away from us, spinning gently. 

“Bloody hell.” I’m soaked and chasing after the boat, which seems to have a mind of its own now. It spins and drifts to the deeper water before I can catch hold of it. 

I’m not the strongest swimmer so I stop when I get chest deep in the water. 

“Get on over here, Snow. I’ll magic it back,” Baz calls from the shore. He’s laughing at me, the jammy bastard, as I squelch up to him. He waves his wand at me first, casting a **_“dry as a bone” _**and then points at the receding silhouette of the boat while clearly enunciating an **_“about face” _**and another **_“ship to shore.”_**

The boat is almost out of eyeshot and I’m still soaking wet. 

**_“Drop anchor!” _**Baz shouts, to no avail. **_“Land ho!” _**The boat rounds the corner of the island and speedily disappears from sight. 

He frowns and turns to me, surveying me critically. “You’re sopping wet.” 

“I’m aware. I don’t think your spells are working.” 

Baz scoffs and points his wand at me again. **“_Dry as a bone.” _**He frowns again and adds a**_“dry clean only.”_**

It doesn’t work. 

“What the bloody hell is going on?” Baz is looking around the island, brows lowered. 

I do the same. I have a suspicion I know what’s going on. Fuck it all. I think I brought Baz to a fucking dead spot. 

For a romantic date. 

I’m a complete idiot. Not that I could have known, of course, but I can’t help feeling I should have _sensed _it somehow. 

Just my luck, bringing Baz to a secluded spot so I can finally tell him how I really feel about him, that I want so desperately to be his boyfriend, how much I want this to work between us, and it’s a fucking dead zone. 

“Simon, this has to be one of those dead spots.” 

I kick at the sand. “I know. Bloody hell, Baz. I’m sorry. I had no idea.” 

Baz shakes his head and moves closer to me. “There was no way for you to know ahead of time, Simon.” He runs a hand through his hair and exhales. “I should have realized when my spells weren’t working. It should have been obvious to me then.” 

“Don’t be a prat. It’s not on you. I should have realized too. Your spells always work—they never go wonky like mine. That should have set the alarms going for me.” I kick the ground again. 

Baz moves closer still, arm sliding around my waist. “Don’t talk that way.” He presses a kiss to my temple and smirks. “You were just distracted by my charms.” 

I lean into him. And then realize I’m now getting _him _wet. “Ugh, sorry, didn’t mean to soak you too.” 

His arm tightens around me. “It’s alright. If there’s anyone I’d be willing to die of exposure with, it would be you, Simon.”

It’s not even that cold but I know how easily Baz gets chilled. “That would really make this the shittiest date ever, Baz.” 

He shrugs. “You’ll just have to do better next time, love.” 

His words warm me up as surely as if he’d spelled a fire for us. I’ve not heard him call me that before and it makes my heart swell to hear it. It’s odd to hear endearments instead of insults but I’m eager to get used to it.

I wonder what Baz would do if I called him “_darling_.” I might have to try that on him next time. 

Next time. There’s going to be a next time and I’ll be damned if I take him anywhere other than our room for our next date. 

But as it is right now I’ve stranded us on this island, at dusk, with no magic to speak of to get us out of this mess. 

No magic. No magic, but we’ve still got our mobiles. Well, Baz does. Mine got soaked when I fell in. It’s probably a lost cause. 

I pull it out of my pocket and the flat black screen stares back at me. Just as I thought. 

“Baz! You’ve got your mobile, right? We could call someone, Penny, maybe, or Fiona?” 

He whips his mobile out of his pocket and taps at the screen. Taps again, more forcefully. “Fucking hell. There’s no signal.”

Right. Of fucking course. I should have known. 

No magic. No mobile service. 

Right. 

What do we do now?

I frown at the far shore. Too far to swim for it, at least for me to swim. For all I know Baz is skilled enough to swim the English Channel. 

“Do you think we can swim for it?” 

Baz narrows his eyes at the water. “I’m a fair swimmer. You?” 

I shake my head. “Pretty minimal, to be honest.” 

“Alright then.”  
  
“You should go, Baz. You can get to shore and then maybe magic a way to get me over?”

“I’m not going to leave you here by yourself. Not when we don’t know how far this dead spot reaches.” 

“Your **_‘steady on’ _**worked just fine before.” 

“True.” He stares at the shore again. “But that’s not where we were when I cast it.” 

Fuck. He’s right. We paddled around the lake before we made for the island. The shore across from us now isn’t the one we started on. 

We’ve no idea how far the dead spot extends. Where it starts. Where it ends. 

“Right.” I think on it for a minute. “Maybe only part of the island is a dead spot? Maybe we should explore a bit, see what’s the rest of it is like?” 

“Seems the best option.”

Neither of us mention the fact that it’s getting darker now. 

My clothes are heavy and stick to my skin. Sand coats my shoes. I must look a right mess. Not that it matters any. 

It’s a good thing I run warm, with the breeze that picks up as we move around the perimeter of the island. Baz shifts closer to me and I’m not going to complain about that. 

I used to play a game with the boys at the home sometimes. What we’d want to have with us if we were ever stranded on a deserted island. Food used to figure prominently in most of our lists. Seeing as we were chronically underfed that made a lot of sense. 

I think about what I’d put on my list now as we walk. 

**Things I would want with me if I were stranded on a deserted island**:

  1. **_Baz_**
  2. **_Baz_**
  3. **_Scones_**
  4. **_A blanket_**
  5. **_Baz_**

I must say, considering I didn’t plan this, I’m doing quite well as far as my list goes. 

Baz tries to spell me dry again when we reach the far end of the island.

Nothing happens. 

I can barely make out the shore now. The sun has sunk below the treetops and the stars are starting to glimmer to the east of us. I think I can see the boat kiosk. Baz should be able to tell for certain.

“Is that where we started then?” I point across the lake. 

“Yes. I can see the kiosk and the other boats by the shore. No sign of our boat though. It’s probably still floating about somewhere.” 

I’m liking the idea of Baz swimming across less and less. It’s getting too dark. He’s not familiar with this lake. He’ll get chilled.

I don’t want to let him out of my sight again. Bad things happen when we get separated. 

It appears he feels that way too. 

“I’m not up for swimming across, Simon.” 

“We’ll be stranded here for the night, Baz.” 

“I’m not leaving you.” 

I slide my arms around his waist, heedless of the dampness of my clothing this time. “I don’t want you to go.” It comes out low and I can’t keep myself from saying the rest of what I’m thinking. “I’d worry too much. I don’t like it when we’re apart.” 

“I don’t like it either.” I feel him brush a kiss into my hair. 

“I’m sorry, Baz. This was supposed to be a romantic date but true to form, with me planning it, it’s turned into a complete disaster.”

“Not a complete disaster if we’re together, love.” He smiles down at me and raises the basket he’s still holding. “And we’ve still got your picnic.” 

We find a sheltered spot, out of the wind, and Baz and I settle our backs against a sturdy tree trunk. It’s almost completely dark now but thank goodness for small favors--there’s a full moon above, so at least we’ve got some light. 

I’m ravenous and we make quick work of the sandwiches. I’m about to eat all the scones but Baz insists we should save something for the morning. We bicker about it for a bit and finally agree to eat the brownies and one bottle of Ribena, leaving the scones and the other bottle for breakfast.  
  
Baz makes a face. “Ribena and scones. Leave it to you, Simon, to come up with such a unique breakfast combination.” He’s not scowling and his voice is soft, so I know he’s just teasing me. 

I wipe the brownie crumbs away and lean into his side. His arm comes around me and I drop my head on his shoulder. He moves closer, so we’re pressed together, shoulder to shoulder, hip to hip, knee to knee. 

I like this. Even if it’s cold and dark and the ground is hard and the tree trunk is lumpy. I’m here with Baz. 

It’s where I want to be. 

I wonder if I should ask him now. Ask him to be my boyfriend. Once and for all. Without all the baggage, the worry, the conditions, the uncertainty.

I’m sure. I know I want this.

“Baz.”  
  
“Yes, Simon?” It’s so good to hear him call me ‘_Simon._’ I don’t think he’s called me ‘_Snow’ _since I told him I prefer this. It gives me the confidence to keep going. 

“I wanted us to have a bit of a special night tonight.” 

He laughs. “Special is one way to describe it, I suppose.” 

“Shut up, you prat. I’m trying to be serious here.”  
  
“I’m sorry. Please go on.” And I think he means it. He actually sounds contrite. 

“It’s been a bit crazy, this summer. With us. With everything. I know I’ve been a complete berk much of the time but I do know one thing, Baz. One thing I’m certain of.” I stop to take a breath and steal a glance at him.  
  
He’s looking at me, eyes wide, lips parted. I’d kiss him on the spot if I didn’t want to make sure I say what I need to say to him. Once I start kissing Baz I lose my train of thought.  
  
I close my eyes for an instant and then open them again, looking up at him. “I’ve known for a while but I just haven’t been sure of how to say it.” I squeeze his hand and he squeezes back. “I like you. I like you so very much Baz. I think I might . . .” I pause. 

Baz’s eyes are huge, dark and deep. I can do this. “I think I might be falling in love with you. I know I’ve said some stupid things and done some even stupider ones. But . . . but I’d really like to be your boyfriend, Baz. Your official boyfriend. Your terrible, awful boyfriend, who’s . . . who’s in love with you. And . . . and I don’t care who knows about it.” 

He’s still staring down at me. 

I start to get a bit anxious as Baz just keeps staring at me, unblinking. I’m about to drop my head, my cheeks flaming, when his hands come up to grasp my face. They feel cool against the heat of my blush, soothing and soft. 

“I can’t tell you how many times I’ve imagined you saying those words, Simon. How many times I’ve dreamed it. Hoped it.” His lips find mine and it’s right. It’s all right. 

His lips slide against my own, my hands are in his hair, the way he’s holding my face--as if I’m something precious. His tongue parts my lips and he’s closer now, thumbs brushing my cheeks, mouth moving on mine. 

It’s moments later when we pause to take a breath. I’m panting but I push the words out anyway. “So, is that a yes? I can be your terrible boyfriend?” 

He’s kissing me again, my lips, my cheeks, my forehead, my eyes—murmuring _‘yes, yes, yes’ _each time he kisses another spot. He pulls back and smiles down at me. “Is that enough on answer for you, love?” 

I feel daring enough to say it. “More than enough, _darling_.” 

He’s on me then, kissing me until I can’t catch my breath, can’t think, can’t feel anything but Baz.  
  
His scent surrounds me, his touch sears my skin. 

Baz. 

_Baz. _

**Author's Note:**

> I could't help using a lyric from the Titanic song "My Heart Will Go On." I know. I'm awful. You knew this going into it. This is a pinch hit chapter and I've lost all my chill.


End file.
